are these wasted days?

so i've gotta do the calendar, the baby book, the announcements (which are almost done), and the trickling stream of Thank You notes. i don't send announcements hoping people will send gifts. just the opposite, because each gift begets another Thank You note. i also need to sort through baby clothes (bittersweet) and maternity clothes (many of which i am still wearing) for Goodwill. and clean. and pack. and say good-bye.

and then there are the days i check e-mails at work, and that's all i seem to get accomplished. i'm on leave. short-tern disability. and i shouldn't worry about work, and projects, and clients, and marketing, and packing my office to go into storage or no-man's-land, because they don't have a place for me. talk about displaced. but i feel torn. and gulit-ridden. and responsible. and out of control.

Peanut is growing like a weed. she's three inches taller and over two pounds bigger. those first weeks are gone, and she's over a month old. should i stop and smell the roses, or continue to obsess about the chaos the month of July brings?