Monday, October 16, 2006

slow motion without additional insight

i'm so tired.

i don't feel well. scratchy throat. fever and chills. i don't want the Punkin to get this. with all my procrastination, dissatisfaction at work, and lack of achievement, how can i continue to function with less?

is it depression? is it the pregnancy? so many questions (and question marks) and no answers. no enthusiasm. i recall folks saying i was very mellow when i was pregnant with the Punkin. even-keel. el Jefe' was amazed/impressed at how i handled stress during those months. i don't remember being this tired, this exhausted. certainly my career and emotions were in a different place. a different time. it all seems so long ago.

i did get through the bitch receptionist at my gyn-ob's office. i actually left two messages, one with the bitch and one with another glorious soul, saying that i needed to speak to my doctor about my prescription for Clomid. (it was generic Clomid, and my crappy insurance didn't cover one red cent of the $5 pill.) he prescribed it because my hormones were out of sync and i was having excessive bleeding. i guess it worked. anyway, he suggested a handful of doctors including one he was in practice with for a couple years. i have an appointment in a little over two weeks, and i was told he'll accept my crappy insurance.

i'm slightly relieved.

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