we're here

we are unofficially Northerners.

the packers packed on Wednesday, the 18th. the movers loaded the 80-ft semi (we only took up a third of it) on Thursday, the 19th. we cleaned and painted and all that goes with leaving a house until Saturday morning. we finally hit the road shortly after noon. the 8-hour drive took over 12 hours, with at least 3 stops to nurse Peanut. we arrived after midnight on Saturday, so it was really Sunday, the 22nd.

the moving truck arrived in the afternoon of Monday, the 23rd.

we're somewhat settled. Punkin has had a full week at his temporary school/daycare. el Jefe' has returned to work full-time and even made two day trips to the South. i finally connected the computer and got internet access yesterday.

according to el Jefe', it's all downhill from here (not getting worse, just getting easier.) i can easliy say i have been through the most exhausting experience of my life. i'm not sure my words convey my lack of enthusiasm and depression at the commencement of this new chapter in my life.

moving

the packers came and went today. no, not the NFL team, which comes to mind especially when your husband and mother-in-law were born and raised in Wisconsin. the guys who show up with a straight truck of cardboard, paper, and tape. 44 boxes in less than four hours. that doesn't include the two-car-garage-stall nearly filled with those packed by el Jefe' (PBO: packed by owner) and my few paltry contributions. they pack everything that isn't tied down. we made el Jefe' retrieve my flip flops and my mother-in-law's birks from a box, or we wouldn't have any shoes.

they load tomorrow.

a realtor came today, after the packers. what a site. i'm sure the house showed fabulously.

there is still cleaning to do. my mother-in-law did a majority of the kitchen cabinets, and Punkin's bathroom. we scheduled the carpets to be cleaned Friday.

Punkin did not freak coming home to a house of boxes. Peanut even had a meal while the packers were here. i, on the other hand, am down.

this is it. hope to post next week. wish us luck ...

running out of time

el Jefe's mom arrived Wednesday afternoon. she'll be with us for three weeks, helping us pack, move, and unpack. she's staying at my parents' house at night while we're still down South because we don't have a bed for her, and my parents conveniently planned a 3-week trip to Hawaii, knowing full well they were having a grandchild and we were moving up North. maybe it was part of their denial and there was less guilt knowing they wouldn't lift a finger to assist in our move.

she gave Peanut her first bottle of pumped breastmilk on Thursday. i stuck around and pumped. it went well. she is very good with infants, assuming the experience with our kids is universal. the extra set of hands gave me the opportunity on Friday to do some "honey-do's" like fixing a window screen and sorting through nearly $500 in change. i left her in charge Friday with a bottle, hoping i could pack up my office at work. i had nearly five hours to sort an pack 9 years with my employer, and 20 years of my career. i ended up bring home a box of three plants, and spending the remainder of time on billable projects. i was all ready overwhelmed by all the aspects of the move. i was all ready frustrated by work interfering with this stage in my life. i realized i didn't get to say good-bye to anyone at the office. i was depressed by my lack of progress in the office, and the fact i would have to return this weekend when no one was around.

i said good-bye to my best friend Lola, Punkin's godmother, last night. we had a full day of packing (toys!), two trips to the GoodWill, and i finally got to swim with Punkin for about a half-hour. she came over for pizza and beer, a little tradition with us. she talked about making new friends but i just can't even hope for that right now.

it will happen. it will be over soon. but i am down. and this is hard.

about a week to go

the proverbial ten pounds of shit in a five pound bag. and i'm trying to cram it all in between breastfeeding a six-week-old Peanut. i get depressed at the drop of a hat. the movers come in about a week (pack Wednesday, load Thursday), but we can't get the "spread" dates (the date our stuff will actually arrive up North). we haven't made reservations for Grandma (el Jefe's mom) for a place to stay up North; either way she's not going to fit in the apartment until our stuff arrives. Grandma is staying at my parents now while they're in Hawaii for a month (convenient trip, don't you think?) ... they also have a dog sitter staying there. how weird. and we may have to camp there (on couches) once our stuff gets loaded. Peanut and Punkin both have 5 kids ahead of them on the day care waiting lists up North, waiting lists that we got on at the beginning of February ... we have an alternate established for Punkin, and that means moving him to a different school twice, but what else can we do? i'm out of FMLA leave towards the end of August, with no office to move to, but being a full time mom was not part of the plan.

i'm making lists, and actually checking things off, and of course adding to them. cleaning, packing, taxes (Hawaii GE, lucky us), donating, and trying to cram in work and more packing. oh, and the interruption every other day that someone wants to see the house. we dropped the price and are offering $5K to the buyer at closing. i'm freaked out that someone is going to show up when i'm feeding the Peanut. i already had a potential when i was changing a diaper ... i honestly think i had poop running down my arm as i answered the door with a naked baby. el Jefe' says i'm too nice. let's face it: i am nearly desperate to sell this house as i do not want to live in an apartment forever. for very long. if this move was to Hawaii, we would have a place to move to. next time ...

i've known this month would be chaotic for awhile. i am getting through it. i just have to keep telling myself that i have something to look forward to.

good bye, Abby.

are these wasted days?

so i've gotta do the calendar, the baby book, the announcements (which are almost done), and the trickling stream of Thank You notes. i don't send announcements hoping people will send gifts. just the opposite, because each gift begets another Thank You note. i also need to sort through baby clothes (bittersweet) and maternity clothes (many of which i am still wearing) for Goodwill. and clean. and pack. and say good-bye.

and then there are the days i check e-mails at work, and that's all i seem to get accomplished. i'm on leave. short-tern disability. and i shouldn't worry about work, and projects, and clients, and marketing, and packing my office to go into storage or no-man's-land, because they don't have a place for me. talk about displaced. but i feel torn. and gulit-ridden. and responsible. and out of control.

Peanut is growing like a weed. she's three inches taller and over two pounds bigger. those first weeks are gone, and she's over a month old. should i stop and smell the roses, or continue to obsess about the chaos the month of July brings?

thank you, Peanut.

so i mentioned we're trying to apply the concepts in "Baby Wise" (the whole wake, eat, play, sleep thing). she's basically on a schedule, that we're not supposed to call a schedule. i believe the term is "parent-directed feeding" or PDF (nothing to do with Adobe), instead of on-demand feeding. it does induce predictability and prevents snacks.

Peanut is one month old, and moreso due to frustration and exhaustion than due to the milestone, we stopped setting the alarm for the 3 am (or so) feeding. for the last two nights i fed her around midnight, and we're all nestled in our beds by 1 am. she makes it until about 5 am. that's four hours of continuous sleep, as opposed to two. el Jefe' thinks we should get her tested (that's an inside joke, directed at our parents).

i had a hard time falling asleep last night. the longer sleep feels worse than the bits and pieces sleep. but i'm not complaining. it has been an amazing month.